SUNDAY MEDITATION by Msgr. Theo Nwalo

FOR YOUR SAKE... - (2)

(Dying That They May Live)

Hello Youths! Here are some more stories for you. On a very wet day in mid-July of 1969 (at the height of the Nigerian civil war 1967-70), an elderly woman came to my temporary residence in the village at Olakwo Obube. I was residing in the village because the parish house had been destroyed in air raid and was completely unsafe for human habitation. This woman was carrying in her arms her two month-old grandson. She made some desperate appeal for some baby milk and for some food ration for the other grand children at home. With tears running down her eyes, she told me that the mother of those children had gone out in search of food for them. The farm was rich in harvest but unfortunately close to the war fronts. As she was in the farm an enemy war plane swooped down, machine-gunned and bombed the area, killing the woman and so many other innocent civilians. Yes, this mother took the risk and died for her children.

There is another case of a man whose house went on fire. He was quick enough to rescue his children and some valuable property. One of the children was in the inner room at the time of the fire outbreak. On realizing this and on hearing the little one's cry, the dad quickly plunged into the raging inferno. He succeeded in rescuing his little one. Sadly he himself could not make it alive. Yes, he died that his child may live. This is exactly what your parents are prepared to do for you should the need arise.

Though not every parent has made such supreme sacrifice for the children, nevertheless, everyday life activities of any responsible and loving parent are, in a sense, acts self-immolation for the sake of the children. Think of the woman who for nine months carries and nourishes in her womb a helpless embryo - all the time at the risk of her own life. A visit to a Motherless Babies Home will easily convince anyone that many mothers lose their lives for the sake of the children.

It is a thing of joy: a thing that calls for celebration when a woman has safe delivery and both mother and baby are healthy. This in itself marks another stage in the journey of life: a stage of loving care and sacrifice. How can anyone look upon a healthy and well- brought up youth without recalling the so many sleepless nights given to the parents by the crying and sick baby? Or the so many rounds to the hospital and the sometimes crippling debts incurred for the survival of the child? Can anyone forget the mental agony parents undergo when they find themselves unable to feed their hungry children? Don't you hear them frequently say: “If I have to starve in order to feed my children, I am content”?

This reminds me of what my aunt did one day when she was sick. Thoroughly drenched by the rain while out in the farm, she came home and down with some high fever. Despite her fever, she went to the kitchen and prepared supper for her children. When I reproached her for not taking the needed bed rest, she very matter-of-factly replied: “If I lie down, my children will die of hunger”. This big sacrifice is not my aunt's prerogative. Every mother does the same.
Isn't it true that parents deny themselves so many good things in order to give their children good education? The other day, I was watching a civil servant budgeting for the month. Top on the list were his children's feeding and education and the house rents. By the time he was through, he had nothing left for replacing his worn-out pair of shoes. He smiled and said to me: “In future, these children will buy me some good pairs of shoes”. In the spirit “he must increase and I must decrease”, don't parents pray for, and rejoice when the children are better off in life than their parents?
Society is angry, very angry, and rightly so, with parents of abandoned children. This is because everyone naturally expects such parents to fulfil the duty imposed on them by God and nature. And such duty involves sacrifices (and sometimes unto death) in ensuring the survival and proper upbringing of their children.

Can anyone forget the stubbornness of children and the offences they sometimes commit that undermine the parents' mature programmes? What of the offences that keep the good parents apologizing to neighbours and society? What of those offences which the children sometimes commit that make the remainder of their parents' life one long nightmare??

In a sense, most parents who have conscientiously laboured for the proper upbringing of their children can speak to those children in the language of St. Paul. (Cf.1 Cor. 4:6-13).

“I went naked that you may be clothed. I went hungry that you may be well-fed. I went without sleep and through many difficulties nights and days that burdens may be lifted from your shoulders and hearts. I wept that smiles of contentment may light up your face.
“For your sake, I became a fool that you may be educated and wise. For your sake, I became nothing that you may be something. I became obscure and powerless that you may be influential and famous. I was insulted, trampled upon and persecuted for many years so that none of those problems may touch or harm you. In general, I die daily that you may live. All these I have very gladly undertaken for your sake...for your sake...for your sake...”

After all these sacrifices undertaken by parents for the sake of their children, one would naturally want to know a few things about the children for whom so many sacrifices are made. In the first place, are they thoughtful enough to realize that sacrifices were made on their behalf? If they were not, why? If they were, what was or is their reaction? Do they either by words or actions appreciate them and say some “thank you”? What inspiration have they drawn from their parents' sacrifices? Do they in a sense see all the sacrifices in the biblical saying of the seed that fell to the ground and died only to produce more fruits? If so, what fruits are they producing? Are they in their turn, ready to make such sacrifices for their own children as a legacy passed on to them?

In most cases, the parents through tears and sacrifices, have handed over to their children the torch of the Christian faith. Do the children appreciate this? Are they ready to keep alight this torch of salvation, and as the carriers of the Torch of Faith (whom carriers of Olympic Torch imitate) run vigorously and hand the same faith intact and unsullied to their posterity? Sacrifices have been made in the name of God and of humanity for their sake. Are they ready to do the same for those coming after them? Questions....questions… Reflections… reflections… Resolutions… resolutions... resolutions galore...